“We Don’t Ever Have To Put Christmas Away” Step 3 and 12

This was the first Christmas in years I have been completely devoid of the desire to “take down Christmas,” as we say.  The first year I remember feeling this way was my first baby’s first Christmas.  My mother-in-law had always decorated her tree with little birds.  She was growing older and was unmotivated about setting up Christmas trees, etc.  A nice poinsettia was all her heart desired.  She graciously gave me all her little birds and the family tradition was carried on in our home.  Mandy was just the right age to be fascinated with the tree and especially with the delicate birds.  I remember taking the tree down, sometime after New Year’s Eve, during her afternoon nap. Tears streamed down my cheeks at the thought of her waking up. It would never be her first Christmas again, and her first Christmas tree covered with little birds would be nowhere in sight. Vanished!

This year I think I could’ve left the tree up indefinitely or at least until the glacier of ice and snow in our front yard melts. My children all voiced to me at Sunday dinner January 4^th that this would be highly inappropriate.  I knew they were right, but I love plugging in the tree on December 26, when all the Christmas parties are over and all the gifts have been bought, wrapped, unwrapped, and taken home.  Somehow at that moment the light on the tree looks different to me. There’s almost a tangible feeling of rest in the room. I had the idea of maybe putting everything away slowly and asked my husband if he would just bring the storage boxes into the house and tuck them away in the family room.  Well, I guess hadn’t really shared with my husband my plans to enjoy the Christmas setting a little longer; I went out for a couple of hours and when I walked into the house the whole tree was down and all the decorations were stacked in neat little piles waiting for my attention.  I gave up and spent the rest of the evening boxing up Christmas. I made the best of it, but I felt like I was boxing up “peace.”

As usual it feels nice to have it all tucked away in the garage again.  And as I write I am struck with the truth that many things don’t keep forever, but Christmas does. Taking the wreath off the front door, boxing up the decorations, and throwing away the last of the goodies on the kitchen counter – Those are the things we do to declare the holiday has ended.  But, there really is no end, because Christmas is Jesus Christ.  His life and the life He has given us is never ending, everlasting.

No matter how much we wish they would, babies don’t last. This year was Mandy’s first Christmas with her first baby.  Now she’s the one with a lump in her throat as she celebrates the lasts of all the firsts.  Even the little glass birds don’t last forever. One by one they have been replaced by more durable, less delicate varieties. But Christmas lasts forever. The day after Christmas and the day after that and on and on day after day the same blessings that come to us because of the life of Jesus remain available.  Christmas is truly The Gift that keeps on giving.

When I box up Christmas I’m not boxing up the His peace, His love, His grace, His revelation or the daily tender mercies that come because of Him. He said, “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the word giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid” (John 14:27).

We can endure all the things of this life that change before our very eyes, because Christ has made all the good and all the joys of this life Eternal. We Don’t Ever Have To Put Christmas Away!

By Nannette W.

Posted Friday, January 9, 2009

From Nannette’s Christmas Archives Re-posted January 6, 2012

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit.  This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

The Bird Clock – Step 12 “Having Had A Spiritual Awakening”

There is a transformation that takes place when a woman moves from being a “forty-something” year old mother of teenagers to being a grandmother. One of the early signs of this change is the acquisition of little eccentric things around the house. It’s quite unexplainable, but grandmothers purchase things to hang on walls and sit on shelves they wouldn’t have considered bringing home in the past. Quite often these are fragile things that little children find fascinating but are not allowed play with: figurines, music boxes, lava lamps, doorbells that play Christmas carols etc. Clocks are high on the “top-ten-list” of grandmotherly acquisitions. My Grandma on my Dad’s side owned a cuckoo clock. It just wasn’t grandma’s house unless that cuckoo squawked out every new hour, on the hour, all night long, followed by a little German folk song. My Grandma on my Mother’s side had a cat clock on the kitchen wall. As the seconds ticked away the tail of the cat which hung below the clock wagged back and forth, and the big round eyes on the face of the cat clock looked left and then right in concert. Strange but quite captivating.

A novelty clock was my first peculiar purchase when I became a grandma. I’m sure I have made others, but I think one becomes so accustomed to being a grandma that we stop noticing. The transformation is almost imperceptible. And our home decorating is not the only sign. One day we simply decided our own mother was perfectly sensible in wearing an apron when she cooked Sunday dinner, and we get one of the many we have inherited but never worn out of a drawer, and we tie it about our waste. More and more often we hear ourselves saying to young people, “Well, when I was a little girl…” Hot cereal is a treat, and finding a pair of sensible shoes is a thing to celebrate. Who knows how it is accomplished. Only God can make a Grandma.

This week I had an experience that involved my bird clock. I share this experience at some personal risk, the risk of revealing that my mind is also showing my age. The other evening I was eating dinner on the back patio. While I was eating I heard my clock announce the hour of the day. Each hour is sounded off by a different birdcall. Several other times in the last ten years I’ve heard this particular call while I’ve been outside close to my house. My mother has a similar clock and lives just across the street. “Perhaps there are others in our maturing neighborhood who own the same clock,” I always wonder. This particular call is so mechanical I can hardly believe there’s a real bird that makes such a noise. I was in a hurry to finish eating and get to an evening appointment. I glanced down at my watch. It read 6:20. “What, my clock must be broken. That bird call is not sounding on the hour.” Then came the great awakening. “Wait a minute! Could that be a real bird! Could it possibly be that every time I’ve been outside and heard that call it’s been a real bird?” My mother phoned while I was taking this in. “Oh, you mean the Morning Dove,” she laughed as I told her about “my moment.”

The next day as I was riding my bike I heard the call of the morning dove again. This time I didn’t wonder which grandma in the neighborhood had just bought a bird clock. No! I looked around and sure enough, up on the telephone wire was the real thing. I was suddenly mindful or awake to something that had always been a reality.

Step 12 speaks of having “a spiritual awakening as a result of Atonement of Jesus Christ.” As we apply Steps 1 through 11 the cumulative effect is a growing spiritual awareness. The before and after distinction is so great that sometimes we say we have come from a place where we were spiritually asleep or dead. This spiritual awakening is directly connected to Jesus. Over time and with hard work we become awake to the Lord. We become acutely aware that the Savior we have read about, and sung about, and been taught about all our lives is more alive and interested in us as individuals than we ever dared imagine.

As a result of applying these Gospel principles to my everyday life I am waking up. I’m beginning to see and feel and hear His persistent witness, to me personally, that He is alive. Through the Holy Spirit I’m learning to recognize His voice. I’m learning to feel His presence. I have experienced His desire to give me direction and power in any aspect of life where I struggle.

My experience with the Morning Dove reminds me of my experience with the Lord, who the Apostle John called “Morning Star.” With the little dove I became suddenly and keenly aware that the call I was hearing was the voice of a living thing. Now that I’m conscious I hear that little bird call many times each day. My awakening to the Lord has been a gradual process but just a real. As I sit hear writing with my office window open I can hear the call of a nearby dove. I think the Lord must intend the little bird and his call to forever remind me that my living Savior is very much alive and always near!

By Nannette W.
Posted Sunday, May 31, 2009

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

The Light at the End of the Tunnel – Steps 10, 11, and 12 The Maintenance Steps

Sunday I attended church with my children and their children. The service closed and before Carson could run off (I mean walk reverently) to Primary I grabbed him and gave him a big hug and asked him how he had enjoyed the Saturday excursion with his family to the zoo.

He reported that it had been fine and fun, “except for the part where I was walking through the prairie dog tunnel and I saw the light and thought I was out of the tunnel and stood up and hit my head on the top of the tunnel!”

Carson ran off to Primary. I thought about how many times in my journey through life I’ve seen the light at the end of the tunnel and thought I’d arrived. And what do I get for my anxious desire to be completely out of the dark? I get a bump on the head and a big reminder that the light I can see up ahead in this tunnel called “mortality” is God’s encouraging invitation for me to press forward in the dark, not a sign that I’ve arrived!

By Nannette W.
Posted Monday, May 18, 2009

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

The “Sick Coat” – Maintaining What We Have Obtained – Steps 10-12

If you grew up with me and happened to have the flue, a fever, the measles, the mumps, or an earache you were given some very special attention in the form of two items of clothing. First, the earache hat, a little homemade flannel bonnet mom placed on our heads if we were suffering the pain of an ear infection. It helped us feel cozy. It felt like a little bonnet of loving care tied securely with a bow under the chin. It also secured the soothing warm drops of oil my mother placed in the effected ear using a little teaspoon and the bit of cotton in the tender ear.

The other piece of clothing we affectionately refer to as “the sick coat.” This was a little jacket with a Hawaiian print on the outside and a terrycloth lining. If one of us was feeling under the weather we got to wear the “sick coat.” Like the earache hat, the little jacket felt like instant tender loving care. I was the first child married with children of my own and I inherited both these treasures and carried on the tradition. As a mother I could see that the wearing of the “sick coat” sent more than a message of love. It was a sign to my child that he or she was in a condition where extra care was needed. It helped them resist the temptation to declare themselves “all better” too early.

It requires a great deal of tender care to continue to make progress in our spiritual health. It’s so tempting, especially when we begin to feel a little better, to stop taking care of ourselves spiritually and physically the way we need to. When I neglect my spiritual and physical care, just like the child who goes out to play too soon, my old symptoms return. The memory of the “sick coat” comes to my mind. In a sense living in recovery requires me to put on such a little jacket every day of my life. It reminds me that I am loved and it helps me remain aware that I am in a vulnerable condition diagnosed as mortality, where continuous care is needed.

By Nannette W.
Posted Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W.
All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

“I’m Going To Count To Three and Then…” – Step 12 Having Had A Spiritual Awakening

The parenting skill that requires moms and dads to count to three, to think of a consequence that will get a child’s attention, and then follow through, must be new to my generation of parents. I don’t remember my mom or dad ever counting. I adopted the technique as a seventeen-year-old freshman at BYU when I was enrolled in a class for potential elementary school teachers. As part of my experience I was required to spend a semester as an aid in an actual classroom. For three months I watched as a seasoned teacher, in the face of thirty plus seven-year-olds, lifted his voice above the clamor with these words: “I am going to count to three and if you do not _______ I will _______!!!!! The response was usually striking. I took note.

By the time I finished student teaching my junior year I was a “counting” professional and I was about to bring my first child into the world. For some reason “professional counting” is much more effective than “mother counting.” As my children got older I found myself counting higher and slower (three, ten, nineteen, nineteen and a half). In addition I became less inventive and had less energy. It was difficult to think of just the right consequences. “Natural consequences” were what parenting specialists suggested. And sometimes the punishment I had to enforce felt more like a punishment for me than the child.

One day I was sitting in Relief Society listening to a lesson on how to discipline children when I heard these words come out of the teacher’s mouth. “I occasionally tell my children that by the time I count to three I want them to ______. I don’t know what I would do if I ever got clear to the number three.” That did it! I didn’t know what I would do either and I always got way past the number three. By the time I was raising my fifth child I would say, with the smile of a mother who has grown a little less serious, “I’m going to count and if you don’t ______ something really really bad is going to happen.” This technique delighted my newly acquired son-in-law who couldn’t wait until the day he could count for little ones of his own.

How I relished the times (and I have to say there were many) when my children were obedient because they wanted to be, because they knew it was right, because they loved me, and because they could see the good that comes from being good.

I’m not so different from the little children in my life. I have been propelled to be “good” based on my desire to stay out of trouble with earthly parents and with my Heavenly Father. I know that if it becomes necessary for God to count to three and levy consequences He is willing. What ever it takes! Enos, speaking of his people says, “…And the people were a stiffnecked people…And there was nothing save it was exceeding harshness preaching and prophesying of wars, and contentions, and destructions, and continually reminding them of death, and the duration of eternity, and the judgments and the power of God, and all these things—stirring them up continually to keep them in the fear of the Lord. I say there was nothing short of these things, and exceedingly great plainness of speech, which would keep them from going down speedily to destruction…”

Perhaps the greatest miracle of applying the 12 Steps and “recovering” our relationship with our Heavenly Father and His Son is the change in our own motivation to do the thing they’ve asked us to do. Today I use the tools we have been given (prayer, scripture study, meetings etc), not to stay out of trouble with God, but to come unto Christ because I love Him and I need His help. As I apply each of the steps to my daily life with His divine assistance I feel His love for me. Today I want my obedience to be motivated by love and humility not “I’m counting to three and then…”

By Nannette W.
Posted Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W.
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The Tools of the Trade

Morning prayer, a little writing in my journal, read and liken a few verses out of the Book of Mormon to myself, a few minutes in some recovery literature along with some writing, plan my food for the day, and a call to my sponsor – that’s how most of my mornings begin. Last week after coming home from the 12:00 pm support meeting I stood at the kitchen sink putting my lunch together and making three outreach calls to other people working to apply the 12 Steps to their individual struggle.

As I hung up the phone and sat down to the lunch I’d committed to my sponsor in the morning I thought about all the tools of recovery I had used before lunch, and a little saying marched through my mind that made me smile: “These are the tools of the trade, Nannette.” The trade? That’s absolutely right! In recovery we trade our relationship with a substance or a behavior for a relationship with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. The tools of recovery or “the dailies” as they are affectionately call are a wonderful gift. They are the tools of the best trade I’ve ever made!

By Nannette W.
Posted Monday, January 19, 2009

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W.
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Walking Around With My Eyes Wide Open! – Having Had A Spiritual Awakening

My little redheaded firecracker grandchild Gracie went through a comical phase as she was perfecting that art of getting around in the upright position. Shortly after learning to walk this half-pint adventurer decided it wasn’t daring enough just to balance on two feet. So, she added the “fear factor” of toddling around with her eyes closed. All about the house she’d go, blind by choice, bumping into door jams and walls and anything that stood in her way. Sooner or later she’d run into something that would take her down. Then this little clown would open her eyes, look around to see which member of her family was watching, and giggle! Gracie’s primary motivation was to do something entertaining, something that would make her older siblings laugh – So innocent and at the same time potentially dangerous.

As I observed Gracie I was reminded of several things in connection with recovery and healing. First, addiction provides a way to move through life with our eyes closed. I know I was blinded by excessive focus on food in tandem with a devastating degree of self-consciousness over my obesity.

Next, the sightless world of addiction is self-imposed. Like Gracie, we willfully close our eyes. Often we do so with good reason. Our separation from the presence of God in combination with difficult life circumstances makes the perfect recipe for fear. And, if you’re like me, when you’re afraid the first thing you want to do is close your eyes.

Finally, watching Gracie reminded me of the truth that for many of us “closing our eyes” start out in our innocents. Longing for adventure, a need for a thrill, entertainment, a way to get attention – these are all common seemingly harmless beginnings of a condition that is self-destructive, and potentially lethal, spiritually and often physically.

It doesn’t matter how young or old we were when we decided to “close our eyes,” or what our motivation was, or how many times we’ve run into the wall. When we apply the 12 Steps to our lives we finally have the courage to proceed with our eyes open. We find the courage to walk through life with our world in full view. As we practice these 12 spiritual principles we finally come to know that Heavenly Father, and Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit can literally be our constant companions. In the reality of Their light and Their fellowship we become willing to look at the hard things of life.

To our great surprise and wonder the miracle doesn’t end there. With our eyes open we are now privy to all the beautiful, wonderful, stunning, lovely, magnificent, miraculous, delightful, precious aspects of this God given life. We begin to take notice. Moments like the one I had watching a little redheaded firecracker walk around the house with her eyes closed are not blindly passed over. It’s a new world, a world of vision, a world of courage and a world of beauty. In daily fellowship with God, I can choose to walk around with my eyes wide open!

By Nannette W.
Posted Monday, December 29, 2008

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All right reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

The High Priced Ticket

A ticket to Disneyland these days is a pretty big investment in giving children some time in the “Happiest Place on Earth”. The price of a ticket, plus food and lodging, not to mention the price of gasoline to make the big journey totals quite a chunk of money.

Eleven of us entered Disneyland first thing yesterday morning, two of my children, their spouses and six children. Some of the children are Disneyland veterans. But today was Sammy’s initiation into the Magic Kingdom!

She entered, donning her “first trip to Disneyland” button. She was greeted by smiling Disneyland employees and the Disneyland Band and the glorious bed of flowers depicting Mickey Mouse himself. Sammy’s eyes kept getting bigger and bigger. As we entered Main Street USA her three most experienced cousins surrounded her with orientation and motivational information. “Sammy you are going to love Big Thunder Mountain. You are going to get really wet on Splash Mountain. You are going to get so scared in the Tower of Terror. Sammy, they have an Alice in Wonderland ride. “

That was the moment that pure delight shot through Sammy. It was visible from the tip of her toes to the top of her head. Her papa looked on. As the moment of joyful excitement and anticipation brought his little four year old off her feet he exclaimed, “That right there was worth the price of the whole ticket.”

Now I know there is no comparison in real terms between the sacrifice we make for the happiness of our own children today and the sacrifice our Heavenly Father and his Son, Jesus Christ have made for our eternal happiness, but I do know this: When we are full to the brim with excitement, anticipation and appreciation for what THEY have provided, I can almost hear them say, “That right there was worth the price of the whole ticket.” And what a price that was!

By Nannette W.
Posted Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All right reserved.
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Coming Down The Mountain – Part 5

As we left the shed and started to descend the trail, I was feeling very frightened. As I looked down the trail we had come up and thought of the steep inclines and slippery snow, I could imagine how I would keep from falling and possibly being seriously hurt. How could we ever make it down? Back down the mountain we started. This is how it went. Step, step, fall. Hold Mel’s hand. Step, step, slip. Step, step, fall. We did this little exercise long enough to realize that our return journey was going to be even longer and harder than our hike up.

All of a sudden, I became aware of a man standing just below me on the trail. I didn’t notice where he came from, but there he stood, holding his hand out to me. I remember thinking, “What a friendly person.” I looked at his mountain-wise attire including his high and dry hiking boots. “How kind of him to shake everyone’s hand as he zooms down the mountain decked out in his ‘four-wheeling’ boots.” I took his hand and shook it, smiling. As I tried to withdraw my hand from his grasp, he refused to let go of it. “Hold on. I’m going to help you down this mountain. You’ve taken more steps on this mountain, today, than anyone.”

For the next several hours we inched our way down the steep, icy trail. Often we were side-stepping. Always, he was ahead of me, planting himself and allowing me slide my slick tennis shoe into the side of his big boots. Sometimes I just held onto his backpack and skied down behind him. At other times I held onto his back pack, looked down at the small patch of snow covered ground between him and I, and put my feet carefully into his footprints. Over and over again, step after tedious and often dangerous step, he supported me. From the moment he took my hand and for all the hours it took for us to work our way down the mountain, I kept thinking, “I can’t believe he’s really doing this for me!”

In humility, I heard the Spirit of Truth whisper to me: “I can’t believe he is doing this for me!” How often in life, when people are struggling do you simply give them a hearty handshake and a good wish and send them on their way, when what they really need is constant, painstaking, time-consuming help getting off the mountain, whatever that mountain is for them. With each step I hoped that I could become more prepared and willing to go the distance with the people the Lord brings into my life.

This next message, I suppose, was the most profound message that came to me during this experience. The spirit spoke, “This strong selfless man who somehow knows your need and is willing to sacrifice himself in your behalf is doing for you what the Lord Jesus Christ will do for you at all times, if you allow Him. He knows you. He knows how many steps you have taken on life’s treacherous path. He knows what your handicaps are, and He loves you. He loves you so much that he bled from every pore to receive the power from the Father to bring you down life’s mountain, not just having survived the ordeal, but changed and prepared for Eternal life.

Nannette, everyone is ill equipped to conquer this trail alone. Your savior on the mountain was capable of helping you down a trail miles long, but your Savior Jesus Christ has the love and power to help all who come unto Him. You who are aware of His love and power must direct other strugglers to Him in word and in deed. You can bear testimony of His assistance by telling others how He is helping us. You can move ahead each day with enthusiasm and faith in Him, so that others may “see your good works and glorify” not you, but Him. Finally, you can literally be empowered by Him to help others who cross your path. He often uses others as his hands and feet and voice. If you want to help Him you must know, like your friend on the mountain knew, that giving someone a hand, a real hand, requires the gift of self.”

To be Continued. (one more time)
By Nannette W.
Posted Saturday, August 30, 2008

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“Oh, Besides Him”

One day I had the occasion to sit in on a Young Women lesson being taught by one of the Young Women. She was teaching a lesson on what the girls could do to avoid immorality. “So, what are some of the things we can do to keep ourselves morally clean?” she asked the class.

There was a long silence. Then one hand went up. “We can go the Lord and pray for strength.”

The youthful teachers response was, “Oh, besides Him!”

The children in my life must see that for me the Lord is the first resort, not the last and that I try to never take His power to direct and protect and enable me to do His will for granted. “Oh, Besides Him!”

Deuteronomy 4:35 “Unto thee is was shewed, that thou mightest know that the Lord he is God; there is none else beside him.”

When it comes to getting through today’s struggles, big and small, I want to show that this is what I believe. I cannot share a message I don’t live.

By Nannette W.
Posted Sunday, August 24, 2008

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All right reserved.
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