Bird-Legs or Wings—Which Will It Be?

I love birds. I think it’s because they’re the only wild creations I can see every day.  I don’t have to go to a zoo or an animal refuge.  All I have to do is keep my eyes open and my ears tuned in.  Years ago I bought a book with pictures and descriptions of all the plants and animals natural to North America.  I bring it on vacations and every time I see a bird I haven’t seen before I record the date and place in the book next to the picture and description.  Though I’m fascinated by all birds, I have grown extremely fond of some of them.  The ones I love most are the ones who have talked to me—not in what the ornithologist might consider bird-calls.  My favorite feathered friends are the ones the Lord has used to call to me.

Take for instance the quail.  Its spring and they are all about the neighborhood.  They’re very cute.  They’ve got that decorative little feather right on the top of their noggins.  They hang together in bunches, families I suppose.  But the thing that draws me to the quail is the way they behave.  They remind me of me (and of you actually).  Have you ever noticed that they do a lot more jogging than flying?  They run, run, run until a car screeches or a child screams by on a bicycle or a toddler tries to chase them down.  Then they do a bit of flying.  Just a bit—not too much mind you—just enough to set them on a fence post or on the rain gutter of my house.  No soaring for them.  Just enough lift to get them temporarily out of harm’s way.  Then it’s back to moving those little bird legs just as fast as they can go.

Me too! I admit it.  So often I run, run, run to the point of exhaustion, fear and anxiety, forgetting entirely that the Lord has promised that, “… they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles” (Isaiah 40:31).  Like the quail, I run until I have no choice but to turn to the Lord and finally take flight.  I run until I’m scared into flying.

In recovery we discover gospel principles that teach us to “wait upon the Lord” instead of running about taking matters into our own hands.  We learn to fly.  We discover our wings.  In the beginning, like the quail, we do a lot more jogging than flying.  Our understanding about wings and heavenly altitude is new.  With continued practice we grow more and more accustomed to using our wings instead of our little bird legs.  In fact, with a little time we come to realize that with the Lord we can fly at all times.

Tolstoy said it this way, “Jesus Christ teaches men that there is something in them which lifts them above this world with its hurries, its pleasures, and fears.  He who understands Christ’s teachings feels like a bird that did not know it had wings and now suddenly realizes that it can fly, be free and no longer heeds to fear.”

The transformation from quail to eagle takes a lot of practice, maybe a lifetime of practice.  The Lord often reminds me, “Nannette, with me you can fly!!!”  But my name and today’s date is still right there in my bird book next to the little insecure quail.  Every once in a while the Lord gives me a taste for soaring and eagles wings.  It fills me with yearning for and a vision of the day when I do not ever ever vacillate.

What I have to do is take that yearning and my developing taste for flight and get practical.  I ask the Lord to help me make progress.  I ask Him to help me spend more and more time in the air and less and less time on the ground.  I ask Him to help me remember I can fly, and He does.  Then He reminds me that though the power is His, the choice is mine. So which will it be Nannette—Bird-Legs or Wings?  That’s what I have to ask myself every morning and every hour of the day.

By Nannette W.

Posted Saturday, April 28, 2012

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit.  This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

So What Does Love Have To Do With It? – Step 2 Hope

Recently my brother stopped by for a short visit.  He came from North Carolina where he lives with his family and was accompanied by his son who just returned home from his mission.  Their ultimate destination was Idaho where my brother would help his son get settled for a new year of university education and then return home to North Carolina.

We are a close family, but we don’t see this particular brother/uncle very often.  That’s what makes it so curious that over the past little while my five year old granddaughter, Gracie, comments frequently to her mother, out of the blue, “I really love Uncle Paul.  I really miss him.”  Wondering if Gracie actually has any idea who she’s talking about my daughter finally had Gracie point him out to her the other day.  Dragging a kitchen chair over to the fridge, she climbed up, pointed to the Christmas card photo collage of aunts and uncles and cousins stuck on the refrigerator door and said, “That’s Uncle Paul!  I love him!”

On Sunday night as usual my children and grandchildren gathered at our house for Sunday dinner.  Before leaving home my daughter told Gracie that Uncle Paul was coming to dinner too.  Her response was, “Uncle Paul! (Gasp!) I love Uncle Paul!”  My daughter laughed at her little drama queen who has only seen this uncle a handful of times in her little life and proceeded up the hill to Grandma Nan’s house.

When Paul entered the house Gracie was standing on the staircase and pretended to faint when Paul entered the room.  All evening she was very attentive and as everyone departed she made sure that out of the 22 of us at dinner she said good-bye especially to her Uncle Paul. As he prepared to leave she handed him her own artistic rendering of the two of them together rolled into a scroll.  She gave him a big hug, and as he exited she said with a bit of sorrow in her voice, “Grandma, I’m really gonna to miss him!”

The next day I tended Gracie for a little while and as she chattered I questioned her, “Hey Gracie, how come you love Uncle Paul so much?”

“Cuz he loves me so much,” she responded.

“How do you know he loves you?”

“Well, he always hugs me and he always smiles when he sees me.”

As she scurried off to help her brothers with their Lego creations I thought, “Nannette, you’re being taught a big lesson in love from a five year old.” Her answers to my questions reminded of the very instructive words I discovered one day in 1 John 4:19 that speak of the relationship of a group of people in ancient times with my Eldest Brother, Jesus. “We love him, because he first loved us.”  In other words, their love for the Lord grew out of their knowing and experiencing His love for them.

Before discovering this verse, the only scripture I had memorized on the subject of loving the Lord was John 14:15 where Jesus said, “If ye love me, keep my commandments” (John 14:15).   This verse had always been a spring-board for feelings like, “Nannette, not only don’t you keep His commandments perfectly, but not doing so is actually a sign that you don’t love the Lord.”  That’s a painful thought for a little girl or a grown one.  But the Spirit of the Lord is an expert at cross referencing. When I finally discovered the eight words of scripture in 1 John the Lord linked them to the verse I had memorized as a child, the one I had used to beat myself up.  In fact seeing these two verses side by side—“We love him, because he first loved us” and “If you love me, keep my commandments”—really got me thinking.

I don’t know if you are like me, but I always want to start with the “keep the commandments” part.  Maybe I need to start with the “love.”  I don’t know if you’re like me, but I always want to start with the “love Him” part, but maybe it’s more helpful to start with the “He loves me” part.  Maybe when I am struggling to be obedient the most beneficial thing I can do is pray to be aware of His love for me—to see it all around me and to believe it’s real, that it’s personal and as tender as I can imagine.  Then my keeping His commandments will be the fruit or the result of His love for me—His mercy, His grace, His sacrifice—His hugs and smiles undeserved.  My obedience will be my loving response to His love.

That’s what Gracie was really saying.  “Grandma, when I know I am loved, I love back.”

By Nannette W.

Posted Sunday, April 22, 2012

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All right reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit.  This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

Think Small – Doing the Next Right Thing – Step 11

When the requirements of the season get BIG I have to think small.  I doesn’t matter whether the season is Thanksgiving or Christmas or a season of great sorrow or heart-wrenching trial or enormous responsibility or wonderful celebration…I have to think small. Today I learned something new about the “think small” principle.

This morning I was reading the Book of Mormon.  I glanced across the page and could see I was going to bump into one of my favorite verses advocating for the small the Lord uses to accomplish the big.  I couldn’t help myself—I skipped and read through the underlined verse that ends with these words, “by small means the Lord can bring about great things” (1 Nephi 16:29).  Such great news for me during a season when everything feels big! Thank Thee Lord!  Then I went back to the place on the page where I had been reading before my eyes had strayed.  Chapter sixteen of First Nephi is largely about a big problem—starvation in the wilderness—and what Nephi did that led to a successful conclusion.

• He endured the anger of his family.
• He took action and willingly constructed a new bow.
• He was humble, and even though his dad was having his own crisis of faith, he went to him for patriarchal advice.
• He looked to the Lord’s compass, the Liahona, for minute directions.
• Finally, he did as instructed and was led to the top of a mountain where he found food aplenty.

As I read my way through the story and arrived back at my underlined verse I realized something new.  Following the story of Nephi and his broken bow, just before the promise that the “small leads to great,” there are these four words, “and thus we see.”  It suddenly became clear that this verse doesn’t just stand alone. This verse actually refers back to the story that has just been told.  I realized that the “small” that brought about the “great” in Nephi’s story was his exact obedience to the next little thing the Lord asked him to do.  Aha!

Today in all the hustle and bustle I am going to keep in mind that it’s not just any “small” thing I choose to do that brings the “great.”  The direction to the right “small” comes from Jesus through my personal Liahona, the Holy Spirit, and the power to multiply small into great is the Lord’s.

Merry Christmas Season everyone!  And may all the small things in your lives be under the direction and accompanied by the power of the Lord, and may He multiply them to accomplish all the great he desires to do in and through you!

By Nannette W., Posted Thursday, December 1, 2011

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W.

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Why All the Wreckage? – Steps 8 and 9 Forgiveness, Restitution, and Reconciliation

Hi, I’m Nannette and today I’d like to share a thought about why those of us who have lived in addiction have not only harmed ourselves but those around us.  This is not a cheery subject, but I think it’s an important thing to understand.  Becoming aware of and doing what we can to take care of the harm we have done to others is a critical aspect of recovery.

“I’m only hurting myself.  If you’re bothered by my behavior you should get a life because this is my problem.”  This is a very common attitude of those who struggle with additions.  My friend told me that when she went to rehab they told her that every addict affects at least thirty people.  I think that’s a small number, because I’ve been to family reunions and there are often more than thirty people there.  We affect a lot of people.  Sometimes family members of those struggling with addiction wonder why in the world they’re affected, “After all, this is my spouse’s (or child’s) problem!”  The reality is that we love each other.  We genuinely care.  We belong to a Church that speaks of eternal families.  Of course we affect each other.

Two of the most challenging steps of recovery are Step 8, “Make a written list of all persons you have harmed and become willing to make restitution to them” and Step 9 “Wherever possible, make direct restitution to all persons you have harmed.”  When I first read the steps I hoped I could skip these two steps altogether and recover just fine, but I couldn’t. In A Guide to Addiction Recovery and Healing it says in the chapter dedicated to Step 8, “Before our recovery, our addictive lifestyles were like a tornado full of destructive energy that cut through our relationships, leaving much wreckage behind.”  Why is that?  Why so much damage?

Recently I discovered a verse in the Book of Mormon that got me wondering what it is about addiction that takes such a heavy toll on anyone standing in its wake.  At first glance you may not think this verse has anything to do with addiction, but bear with me:

“Because of pride, and because of false teachers, and false doctrine, their churches have become corrupted, and their churches are lifted up; because of pride they are puffed up. They rob the poor because of their fine sanctuaries; they rob the poor because of their fine clothing; and they persecute the meek and the poor in heart, because in their pride they are puffed up” (2 Nephi 28:12-13).

The world of addiction, though not a conventional church, certainly is a place of worship for many. One of the definitions of worship is extravagant devotion and excessive attachment (see Merriam-Webster Dictionary and Thesaurus).  This does indeed describe the relationship of addicts to drugs, alcohol, food, money, possessions, pornography, TV, computer games – the list goes on and on.  Addiction is the kind of church described above, built on pride, by false teachers, on false hopes and it is full of corruption.  In order to support this extravagant devotion or worship, the addicted must steal.  This verse describes the truth that there is no mercy.  Rich and poor alike are affected.  In the last two years my children’s old car that sits in front of our house has been robbed three times, but the kind of theft that takes place in addiction is not limited to money or material possessions pawned to get money for drugs.  As addicts we rob those around us of their time, their relationships with others, their trust, their energy, their health, their feelings of worth, their hopes and their dreams.

The thought that came to me as I read this verse is that those of us who have worshiped at the church of addiction have had to steal from others, causing great harm, in order to support ourselves and the substances and behaviors that have become for us a kind of idol.  Why? When we follow and worship the Lord Jesus Christ He supports us, He empowers us, He loves us. When we follow and worship the addictive things of this world we are not supported by the Lord.  We are all on our own, but the things we worship require support – $$$$, time, energy – things we do not have of ourselves, so we have to steal form others to maintain our god, with a small “g.”

It doesn’t seem to matter what we worship instead of God.  Any addiction places us in spiritual bankruptcy, and that empty account has to be filled some way.  All of us who have struggled with addiction are guilty of robbery.

I’ve never paid too much attention to the words of the second verse of the song, “I am A Child of God,” but the other day they struck me with great force—“I am a child of God and so my needs are great.”  We are not low maintenance. As children of God we stand in great need, and we cannot meet those needs by ourselves.  A vital part of recovery is to do the best we can to make amends for or return what we have taken from others in our misguided need to support ourselves and our addictions.  In recovery we move from spiritual poverty and a life of “crime” against ourselves and others to a life supported by the only One who can truly meet our great needs.

By Nannette W.  Posted Thursday, November 11, 2011

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit.  This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

 

“The Lion and the Lamb” – Step 3 Trust in God

Several weeks ago my aunt called early one morning to request our prayers in behalf of her grandson.  He had been enjoying his missionary preparation day at a local zoo in Guatemala and was in the process of taking a photo of his fellow missionaries from what seemed to be a great vantage point. As he stood on a high wall in front of the lion’s cage two lions reached through the bars and he was brutally attacked.  Doctors have worked round the clock trying to save his life and his arm if possible.

I’ve had two recovery thoughts in connection with this event. My first thought is in regard to my cousin’s first words after the attack.  They were, “Please don’t tell my mother and please don’t send me home.”  Bless his heart, but he couldn’t keep this news from his dear mother and he certainly was powerless to determine where he would be sent. When we absolutely know we are powerless, our trust in God and God’s helpers becomes a necessity. I was reminded that none of us can forever keep our difficult situations a secret from those whose prayers we need, and none of us can predict where the Lord will send us for further healing and growth.

My second thought came shortly after hearing of this young man’s critical condition.  I was attending an LDS Addiction Recovery meeting, and I decided to share about my cousin.  At the conclusion of my sharing I said, “There is no group of people anywhere who understand what it is like to get too close to the lion’s cage than the people in this room.  We have all been there.”  It became very still in the room. The air was thick with love and understanding and compassion.  My friends in recovery know!  They know not only that they have done very risky things too, but that there isn’t a soul on earth who hasn’t placed themselves in grave danger at one time or another.  It’s true that we don’t always get caught. A friend of mine told me that his son also served his mission in Guatemala and had apparently visited the same zoo. After hearing the news of my cousin’s situation his dad asked him if he had stood on that same wall to take a photo and he replied, “I take the fifth.”

I came away from the meeting knowing that the most important thing isn’t to waste precious time and energy judging each other’s close calls with physical or spiritual danger.  The critical thing is to come to know is that there is no lion in our lives or in anyone else’s life more powerful than Heavenly Father’s Lamb.

This week on the ten o’clock news they aired an interview with my cousin.  I was deeply moved as he spoke of his experience and showed his scars. He was not hesitant to allow the public to observe the reality that after more surgeries than anyone should have to endure, he chose to sacrifice his arm.  The Spirit reminded me that in order to make progress toward our full potential we will all be called upon to make courageous sacrifices, to surrender things that are very difficult and even painful to let go of, in order to ultimately receive the greater blessings that Lord has in store for us.  Anyone who has worked through the 12 Steps and the process that brings recovery from addiction or from any of life’s struggles knows the sacrifice required.

As I watched the news that night I looked in his eyes and observed his spirit. I could tell that this is not the end of his life. It’s not the end of his mission.  It is just the beginning.  No matter how difficult the situation, the sacrifices we make in order to choose life, always bring new life!  The Lord promises that, “all things work together for good to then that love God” (Romans 8:28). Our challenge is to take the lord at his word.  He says all things!  If we are willing to follow Him like a lamb there are no exceptions, no matter what the lion in our lives may be!!!

By Nannette W.

Posted Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Copyright 2011 by Nannette W. All right reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit.  This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

 

“Pray As If…” Step 3 Trust In God

There’s old saying goes something like this: “Pray as if everything depends on God and then get up and go to work as if everything depends on you.” The point of this adage is to remind us that we shouldn’t pray and then simply sit around and wait until God takes action. I get the point, and I don’t want to offend anyone who has used this thought in a motivational talk, but I have a problem with this advise.

My problem is that any notion that I am alone in my work either paralyzes me into inaction or terrifies me into a workaholic frenzy. I absolutely cannot do the work of the Lord, in the Lord’s way, if I entertain the idea that it all depends on me. I have to go to work knowing I can absolutely, thoroughly, completely, without doubt, with out question depend on God to help me!

King Benjamin shares the secret of his power “to do” when he says he has served the people with “all the might, mind, and strength which the Lord hath granted unto” him. (Mosiah 2:11). Those words are among the most hopeful in all scripture. Sometimes a good old saying brings good old-fashioned wisdom, but sometimes a good old saying brings the “same old, same old” behavior that keeps me going in non-productive circles.

I believe I work harder knowing He is with me then I do trembling in perceived loneliness. Today I pray as if everything depends on God and then I get up and go to work as if the Lord is completely dependable.

By Nannette W.
Posted Monday, November 23, 2009

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

Enjoying An Evening of Abstinence Book of Mormon Style

One morning during Family Scripture Study I read my four verses aloud and then paused before commenting with that well used expression “Hmmm?” My family broke into laughter, poking fun at their scripture-loving /scripture-likening mother. “She’ll find something in it. You just watch,” said my husband, giving me his vote of confidence. These were the verses at hand:

Alma 55:29-31
29 Many times did the Lamanites attempt to encircle them about by night, but in these attempts they did lose many prisoners.
30 And many times did they attempt to administer of their wine to the Nephites, that they might destroy them with poison or with drunkenness.
31 But behold, the Nephites were not slow to remember the Lord their God in this their time of affliction. They could not be taken in their snares; yea, they would not partake of their wine, save they had first given to some of the Lamanite prisoners.
32 And they were thus cautious that no poison should be administered among them; for if their wine would poison a Lamanite it would also poison a Nephite; and thus they did try all their liquors.

When the Lord says to liken all scripture unto ourselves these verses were not on the list of exceptions. There was definitely something instructive to me. These were my thoughts.

1. “Many times did the Lamanites attempt to encircle them about by night…”(v.29) – For many of us the hardest time of day to remain abstinent from destructive substances and behaviors is during the nighttime hours. How many daytime hours of abstinence and sanity have I experienced that ended in nights of over-eating, over my bedtime, over-thinking, over-worry, over-crafting, or over-organizing etc.

2. “And many times did they attempt to administer of their wine to the Nephites, that they might destroy them with poison or with drunkenness…”(v.30) – I’ve never been drunk with wine, but I can easily lose focus and stop doing the will of God as a complex day comes head to head with my weariness at day’s end. Often no one knows but me. I know it! To others it just looks like an evening “snack” and a project “she’s” excited about, but to my physical and spiritual welfare it’s poison. It’s addiction.

The next verses beautifully express the way to spend an evening of abstinence Book of Mormon style. These verses help us understand how they resisted.

3. “But behold, the Nephites were not slow to remember the Lord their God in this their time of affliction…” (v.31) – First and foremost they remembered their God.

4. “They could not be taken in their snares; yea, they would not partake of their wine, save they had first given to some of the Lamanite prisoners…” (v.31) – They would not partake. They abstained from anything that might possible be unsafe.

5. “And they were thus cautious that no poison should be administered among them; for if their wine would poison a Lamanite it would also poison a Nephite…” (v.32) They were cautious.

6. “and thus they did try all their liquors.”(v.32) “To try” is not necessarily to taste. Sorry! “To try” is to examine, to prove, to check.

So, if you are like me and the evening is a challenge to your abstinence and sanity, perhaps we should join our ancient brothers and sisters in remembering the love and power of our Lord Jesus Christ; in not partaking, in abstaining; in being a little more cautious with the setting of the sun; and in testing or examining what is offered to us, behavior or substance, before accepting it. This is how to Enjoy An Evening of Abstinence Book of Mormon Style!

By Nannette W.
Posted Monday, June 29, 2009

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

“To Be Opened and Used Immediately!”

My mother-in-law was very generous with other people but frugal to a fault with herself. She was a serious minded young adult during the Great Depression. Thus she brought into her future, the modern age of materialism and waste, and into family view, a curious attitude toward gifts. Finding the right gift for her at Christmas, Mothers Day, and on her Birthday, was forever troublesome to me. I would worry worry worry over the perfect gift, find great delight in finally purchasing it, and then watch as she opened it, for any sign of joy and excitement.

Her reaction to my gifts was as predictable as the sunset. No matter what I’d purchased for her it was either the wrong kind of something, or something she didn’t feel she really needed, or, and this was the hardest of all, it was something too nice to use now. Most gifts were either returned or put on a shelf or under plastic, to be saved for a special occasion. One year for Christmas I searched and searched until I found a robe I thought she would enjoy. On a hanger, under plastic, and into the back of the closet it went. She said she would save it for a future hospital stay. And bless her heart, when she died it was still in the back of the closet.

In recent years I’ve become aware that I am not so different from my mother in law when it comes to accepting and using certain gifts. As crazy as it might seem, the gifts I seem to be most resistant to and suspicious of are the gifts sent from God. Instead of continually receiving them and putting them to good use today, I’m tempted with the thought that they’re just not quite right, not what I wanted or need at this time, or that they are so special perhaps I should store them away for another day.

I found a scripture that in the Doctrine and Covenants that helped me to see that one of the things Jesus was perfect at was receiving gifts (grace) from His Father. Being a perfect gift (grace) receiver was a very important part of fulfilling His mission.

Jesus did not return or reject even one of the gifts (grace) sent from Above. In Doctrine and Covenants 93:12-14 it says that Jesus accepted every gift sent by His Heavenly Father. “And I, John saw that He received not of the fullness at first, but received grace for grace.”

Next John tells us that the way he progressed toward all His Father would have Him receive (a fullness) was to act upon or use the gifts of God to fulfill His mission. “And He received not of the fullness at first but continued from grace to grace, until he received a fullness.” To “continue” is to “endure, to last, to persist.” Jesus was able to endured as He received and put to use gift after gift from His Father.

Jesus himself was the greatest example of receiving grace from His Father. We become more and more like Jesus Christ as we more consistently receive (accept) grace for grace and then continue from grace to grace (endure by acting upon the gifts received).

Recovery, healing, and progress are made possible in proportion to my willingness to receive and use the gifts the Lord chooses to send me today. The Lord doesn’t send “white elephants” and the Lord doesn’t send gifts that are so fragile or seasonal or special that they must sit in storage. He sends me the perfect gift. He sends me what is expedient, what I really need, when I need it. And written on all His packages, all His gracious gifts, are the words, “To Be Opened and Used Immediately!”

By Nannette W.
Posted Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

"Who’s Character Is In Question?" – Step 7 – Humility

Recently, while I was on my knees speaking to my Heavenly Father I was struck with a thought that made me pause. It seemed to be a call to rethink the kinds of things I say to the God of the Universe. What came to me was that often in my prayers I pray for Heavenly Father, the perfect Father of my spirit, to be kind, to be patient, to be aware of me, to be cognizant of my children, to care for the earth, and to be mindful of our country and our economic situation. “It sounds, Nannette, like you are praying for God to develop His character in your behalf.” Heavenly Father’s character, His nature is already divine. It’s my nature that must change. My prayer time would be better spent “humbly asking Him to remove my character weaknesses (see Step 7) so can more fully enjoy His divine nature. Paul advised us to “…be a partaker of the divine nature” (2 Peter 1:4). I can be assured that His patience and long suffering and loving kindness are well in tact. It’s my character that needs an overhaul, not His.

By Nannette W.
Posted Monday, April 6, 2009

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

“How Is It That You Have Forgotten?” – Step 11 Personal Revelation

Please forgive me for returning to a learning ground I have visited in the past, but a soccer field full of five year olds is such a rich spot of ground for being taught at all levels. Carson seems to have a little more energy for the game this season. In last weeks game he actually made two goals – He scored one for his team and one for the opposing team.” When his mom asked him what happened he answered back, “I Forgot!”

I can relate to your experience Carson. I’ve never played a game of soccer, but I have scored for the other team, for “the enemy” in the game of life. After I come to my senses I often question myself. “What were you thinking Nannette? What happened?” My answer is almost always, “I forgot.”

The ability to remember must be a very important part of our progress. The word “remember” is used 275 times in scripture, not by accident. Being forgetful seems to be one of the greatest handicaps among the children of Heavenly Father.

My tendency is to forget all kinds of important things: Spiritual confirmations I have felt when doing good; The pain I have felt as I have made a poor choices; Things I’ve committed to do; Reasons I’ve made commitments in the first place; Promises I’ve made to God and to others; Gifts I’ve received; Miracles I’ve witnessed; Sacrifices that have been made for me. I forget that people mean well, that people are forgiving. I forget that it’s about progress and not about perfection. I forget that the Atonement is for me, today. I forget that I can repent and start clean. I forget that God promises to forget. I forget that God loves me no matter what.

A question comes to my mind. It’s a question that Nephi asks his brothers after a particularly rough day. He say, “How is it that you have forgotten?” (1 Nephi 7:10). One day I was reading these words and it struck me that this is a good question to ask myself. So often I ask myself in disgust, “Why did you forget?” This question is usually not very helpful. It leads me to either self-loathing, as I beat myself up for being stupid, or it leads me to be self justifying, as I look for someone else to blame for my memory lapse.

Nephi doesn’t ask “why?” He asks, “How is it that you have forgotten?” “How” means “in what condition?” or “for what reason?” The answer calls me to inventory what I did or did not do that diminished my personal ability to remember the things that are important to my progress. How was it that I came to be in such a state of forgetfulness that I ran a play and score for the Devil.

I usually don’t have to look very far. In fact if I ask the Lord He will tell me. He’ll remind me that I have neglected to do those things that enable Him to bless me with a magnificent memory. Remembering is actually a gift of revelation. Through the Holy Spirit, Jesus Christ can and will help us recall, deep inside of our hearts, powerful understandings, feelings, and experiences that seem to be easily forgotten or set aside without His help. Early morning prayer and study from the scriptures, and a heart full of prayer throughout the day are not duties. They are invitations, the act of giving the Lord permission to bring images or ideas to our minds, from the past, that will keep our heads in the game, keep our legs running in the right direction, and keep our feet from the temptation to kick to ball across enemy lines.

The idea is to live this day so I do not score against myself, and when I do (because I inevitable will), I will learn from the experience by asking the right question. “Nannette, how is it that you have forgotten?” Better yet, “Lord, how is it that I have forgotten?” And then do those things that invite Him to fix my “rememberer!”

By Nannette W.
Posted Tuesday, March 31, 2009

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