“Mom, Don’t You Think I’d Be Like One of Those Guys?” – Patience with the Process

Before we get too far into October I have a thought that was inspired by ten words spoken this year, by a little boy, on September 11th. My four young grandchildren woke up and got going on the day, like it was the same as any other. They busied around taking care of the standard daily kind of things – bed making, jimmies back in the drawer, a little cold cereal, the trash emptied, and a little time improving skills at the piano. As they proceeded on this fall morning, with the regular things of life, my daughter – their mother, realized that although September 11th was significant to her and will be forever imprinted on her mind, her four young children knew little or nothing about its importance. She determined to sit down with them and see what she could do to pass on the meaning of a day she had actually experienced, a day that has simply become a piece of history for the nations children.

I imagine that for my Grandchildren it was like the day I came home and told my mother that we were learning about World War II in school and she proceeded to describe what is was like to sit around the radio as a twelve year old girl and hear President Roosevelt announce that our country was under attack, or the day I shared with my children what it was like to wake up, as a young girl to the news that someone had shot the President of the United States – and then his brother, or where I was on the Junior High grounds the day we lost Martin Luther King, that man who had a magnificent dream for our country.

Before they got too far into the day my daughter gathered her little crew around her and unfolded for them the details of her life on September 11th 2001. She described where she had been when she received the news that our country was under attack, how it felt to turn on the TV and watch with horror and disbelief as the Twin Towers fell over and over again, replay after replay. She got out old newspaper clippings and tried the best she could to help them understand the great sadness that came over the world because of the tremendous loss of life. She told them stories of sacrifice and tried to convey the tenderness towards humanity and the love of country that awoke in her that autumn day. “Ethan,” she said, “All this happened when you were a brand new baby. You know how your baby blanket is red, white and blue? Why do you think I made it out of those colors?” Suddenly, an under-appreciated piece of Ethan’s life took on new meaning. “Oh!” he said with newfound understanding. “I never knew!”

She finished her history lesson by telling them about the sacrifice of the men and women on Flight 93, how they had determined to do whatever it took to fight back and put a stop to the death and destruction of that day even though it meant giving everything they had to give. “Because of their sacrifice they kept their airplane from crashing into the White House or the Capitol and killing countless others.” Ethan’s eyes grew bigger and bigger. For this little 8-year-old Jedi, with a closet full of light sabers, this real life tale of people willing to oppose the dark side with there lives if necessary, hit home. It struck him in a way all parents hope the lessons of history will strike their children. Speaking of the willingness to fight back to the point of the ultimate sacrifice he said, “Mom, don’t you think I’d be like one of those guys? Don’t you think I’d fight the bad guys like they did?”

I had just gotten home from an evening Addiction Recovery Meeting when my daughter called to say good night and to share this experience. Ethan’s simple innocent question struck a tender chord inside of me. I had just spent an hour and a half with a group of individuals who at one time in their lives had probably been as hopeful of making future courageous choices as my grandson. Somewhere along the way though, we encountered the unpredictability of life and the reality of the forces of evil, combined with our own weaknesses. In one way or another we had each become a disappointment to ourselves.

Thinking of Ethan and his 8-year-old innocent optimism I silently asked,” Dear Heavenly Father, How do we ever cross that great gulf that lies between today’s disheartening reality and yesterday, when we anticipated only the best in ourselves?”

Immediately I pictured myself sitting with Heavenly Father in my pre-earth life, gazing down as history unfolded, watching all the great and brave souls that walked the earth before it was my turn to come down. Inspired and full of pre-mortal optimism, yet completely inexperienced with the rigors of the test just ahead, I looked on and asked, “Father, don’t you think I’d be like them? Don’t you think I’d do what they did? Don’t you think I’d be that kind of girl?”

In my imagination I could see Him smiling at my innocence and then tears welling up in His loving eyes. “Yes, you have every potential of becoming that kind of a girl, but remember, you will not become such over night and you can only become such with Our help. There is a sure bridge that crosses that great gulf that lies between today’s reality and yesterday’s divine potential. It’s made of patience with the process of becoming, humble reliance on your Heavenly Father and your Savior, Jesus Christ, and remembering again and again and again that you are headed for earth life precisely because you are ‘that kind of girl’ or ‘that kind of boy’ in the making.”

By Nannette W.
Posted Saturday, October 3, 2009

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All rights reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

"The Sixth Brave Man" – All Steps

One day in our home school I read to my children of a fireman and four of his fellows who rescued a man from a burning building. At the conclusion of the story the author referred to “six brave men.” At hearing this, the children said, in unison: “But there were only five brave men!” Of course the kids were referring to the five-man team of rescuers. We concluded together that the sixth man referred to must be the one who was rescued. Then I posed this question to the children. “Does it take courage to be rescued?” “Yes,” they resounded. “The man in the story had to be willing to jump from a window ledge high above the ground, away from a burning building, and grab hold of the coat of a fireman who was dangling over the roof top of a neighboring building and who was being kept secure by four other firemen sitting on his legs.” We concluded that yes, it takes courage to be rescued!

Every day we have the opportunity to observe efforts to rescue those among us who are in trouble or in danger of some kind. As observers we often acknowledge only the brave efforts of those doing the saving. After all, what choice does the endangered man have? Does he have a choice?

He can choose “not to choose” and simply go down in flames! Or, he can exert himself in the direction of his rescuer, reach out, cry out, let go, or just hang on to the will to live until help arrives. No matter what is required, it takes courage to take the action that moves the endangered toward those striving to save him. It required courage for the man in our story to leap into the promising emptiness.

Just as real is the courage required by those of us desiring to be rescued from the deadly flames of addictive substances, compelling destructive behaviors or from any of the trials of life that threaten to destroy. It always requires courage to flee the known enemy and enter the unknown, reach out, cry out, let go, or just hang on. The giant leap toward being saved has been broken down into 12 Steps. They are the detailed directions to those who finally recognize the peril they are in, to those who are being consumed by something beyond their control. God centered, principle-based progress is not passive.

The 12 Steps teach the endangered “natural man” exactly how to reach out to his Rescuer, his Savior, amid the flames that threaten his life. They teach us how to make the saving Atonement part of our lives today. It has been said that taking the steps is simple but not easy. When one is frozen in fear, engulfed by that which would take his life (physically or spiritually) even the simplest act of will takes undying courage, the courage to not die, to be saved from our sins, from our circumstances, from our infirmaries, from our sorrows, and from the compulsive addictive behaviors that threaten our very lives at worst, and at least the happiness of our lives. It takes courage to reach out to The Savior. Taking the structured gospel centered steps represents our brave effort to move in the direction of the Lord’s powerful, loving arms. The temptation to do faithless nothing or to pridefully attempt self-rescue is very real. Yes, it takes courage to be the “sixth brave man” and move toward “The Rescuer.” May God grant us that courage today!

By Nannette W.
Posted Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All right reserved.
Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

“No More Monkeys Jumping on the Bed” – Fellowship: Meetings and the Help of Trusted Support People

The rhyme “No More Monkeys Jumping on the Bed” is a favorite among all the little kids in my world. For those of you who don’t know, it starts out, “Five little monkeys jumping on a bed. One fell off and broke (or “bumped” depending upon the rendition) his head. Mama called the doctor and the doctor said, ‘No more monkeys jumping on the bed.” It goes on to tell the story of the four that were left and how they learned absolutely nothing from the one who is now under a doctor’s care. One by one they mindlessly take up jumping again. One by one they repeat the experience of the first little monkey until all of them have been carried off on a stretcher and there are literally, “No more monkeys jumping on the bed!” Why? Because there are no more monkeys left! One day I was singing this song with a group of kids I care a lot about and the thought came to me, “You know Nannette, there’s a message here!”

One blessing of attending recovery meetings and seeking out and working with the support of those who have personally applied the 12 Steps, is the opportunity to learn from the experience of others. And what experience do we share? We share what life was like for us when we refused countless times to learn from the suffering of others and the resulting fall that broke our bodies, our spirits, and our relationships. Then we share the great contrast between life then and our life in recovery today.

This is a rhyme about five little monkeys who refused to begin a life in recovery by learning from the experience of their fellow primates. My hope is that someday there will be an end to the cycle of needless damage to bodies and souls. Someday there will be “No More Monkeys Jumping on the Bed” not because the last little monkey has fallen of, but because we choose to learn from each other, from those who have gone before, to accept God’s direction and power, and to opt out of destructive behavior. Any one of us can put an end to this rhyme. We can say, “This Little Monkey’s Done Jumping on the Bed!” With God’s help I can do it today!

By Nannette W.
Posted Friday, September 5, 2008

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All right reserved.
Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.